The search for funny Irish jokes is a personal one. If you enjoy clever wit, a bit of irreverence, mixed with a keen sense of the ironic - Irish jokes are very likely to tickle your funny bone!
Now you may be wondering, 'what is the difference between 'funny' Irish jokes and any other kind of joke?' Great question!
It's no secret some jokes work, and some don't. We think you will agree the examples below are the first kind!
Two best friends, Paddy and Murphy, are working on the site of an office building.
Paddy says to Murphy, “Well, buddy, I’m going to get a day off by pretending to be mad!”
Paddy climbs up the rafters, hangs upside down by his knees and then shouts at the top of his lungs, “I’m a light bulb”.
He kept saying it until the foreman has had enough and yells, “Paddy, you fool! You’re mad. Go home!”
Paddy leaves the site. Murphy starts packing his things so that he, too, can leave.
The foreman asks, “Where are you going?”
Murphy says, “Well, I can't very well work in the dark, can I?”
After having won loads of money at the pools, Paddy asks Murphy to go on the
piss with him in London (If you're confused, going on the piss means to drink abundant amounts of alcohol...)
When they arrived in London, they checked into a hotel and were billeted on the 10th floor. Then off they went to the best bars in the city to get, well, as drunk as any Irishman can be. At about 2 in the morning, they went back to the hotel.
Paddy wanted to swim. Murphy, who was a bit miffed, asks, “Where in the bloody hell will you go swimming at this time?”
Paddy answers, “We can go swimming in the Thames!” He looks out over the balcony and sees a puddle on the road.
He exclaims, “Oi, Murphy, there it is!” and proceeded to jump in his
skiddies.
(That’s "underwear" in case you're confused.)
After 5 minutes, Paddy shakily got up and shouted to his pal, “Move over to the right just a bit. This here is the shallow end.”
Two Kerrymen, Murphy and Paddy are taking a stroll in the city streets.
Murphy falls in a manhole and is severely hurt but conscious.
He calls out to Paddy, “Paddy, call me an ambulance!”
And Paddy being the obedient friend that he is, jumped into the hole, yelling
“Murphy’s an ambulance! Murphy's an ambulance!”
Paddy is walking along a country road when an Englishman asks him,
“Excuse me. What’s the quickest way to Dublin?”
Paddy asks, “Are you on foot or in a car?”
The Englishman answers, “In a car.”
Paddy says, “Well, that’s the quickest!”
Irreverent humor is an essential part of Irish culture and heritage. Sharing funny Irish jokes like these is a fun way to celebrate your personal Irish side! For more information of this type, you may want to visit to our main section on Irish jokes here.
It is probably obvious - at Irish Expressions, we love Irish wit and wisdom! Knowing the perfect Irish 'thing to say' on any occasion gives us a deeper sense of connection with Ireland, wherever in the world we happen to be!
To help you build your own personal Irish vocabulary, we have over the years created many downloadable, share-able Irish games, puzzles, recipes, songbooks, quizzes, and much, much more.
Want them right now? Keep reading to learn about "Your Irish Expressions Playbook."
Congratulations on learning more about the Emerald Isle and discovering what we like to call your "Irish Side." You may be thinking "I'd love to actually VISIT Ireland but that's really not in the cards right now. What am I supposed to do with the stuff I just learned?"
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